Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Pushing Too Hard?

I'm trying to be the best dad that I can be, you know that, right? I just want to be sure that you do.

I think that my silly expectations are impeding Abby's growth already. I remember in the weeks before Abby crawled I began to get excited about the fact that shew as not yet there. So very close, but she could just not get it. I tried and tried, holding her little belly up and moving her knees for her. Turns out that she got it when she was darned well ready.

Now we are at the stage where she is So ready to walk, and I think I'm doing it again. She will walk for a mile as long as there is something to hold on to. It could be a finger, a chair or even just the lightest touch of her hand on a pant leg. She has a push-behind walker toy here, and uses the one at church. She can practically run with those things.

I have to try really hard not to make her stand up and practically push her, in a literal sense, to take a few steps. I know that I'm asking for more trouble than it's worth by thinking that she should be walking, but it's just that she's SO close that it seems obvious that she should be walking today. Or yesterday.

One of the other Abigail's at school has already taken a few steps, and I think that I'm wanting our Abby to be as competitive. I know that I should not push that on her. Right?

Am I crazy for giving a little push? I try not to be obsessive about it, but I can just see it so clearly.

4 comments:

Amy said...

#1 - Tie her feet together! Once they start walking, it's All Over.

#2 - Pushing too hard is when you say, "You can't go to Gymboree if you don't start walking right NOW!" or "I will only love you if you walk to me!" (in other words, things that no sane parent would say to a soon-to-be-toddler). I think you're being cute, involved, and encouraging.

#3 - I wasn't kidding about the feet.

Amy @ http://prettybabies.blogspot.com

Sarahlynn said...

A little boy in Ellie's first play group walked like that for months. One little finger hold or a brush of parental pants-fabric was all he needed to walk and walk and walk, but take that crutch away and he wouldn't take a single step. After a while (many weeks, at least!) he got past that and is now a very active and independent little boy.

Of course, hearing "this too shall pass, and later will seem so brief you can barely remember it" is no use in the moment, especially because our children don't come with instructional booklets that tell us: hey, I'll start walking when I'm exactly X months and XX days old, dada.

Besides, Abby's still way ahead of a certain same-age baby I know. ;-)

Anonymous said...

In my humble opinion, children are totally not goign to get it, no matter how hard you want it, until they are ready. Really. My #1 didn't walk until 15 months. Three moths later, her brother appeared; there is NO MOTHER who wanted her kid to walk more than me! I was hugely pregnant and lugging her around. Fast forward - I thought for sure #2 would walk sooner. He was pulling up and standing alone, but didn't actually walk until 16 months.

Go Abby! She'll walk, and you'll love it! Sometimes you'll wish she didn't want to walk everywhere all the time, but it's fun fun fun!

Sarahlynn said...

Tara, I agree! In fact, I waited to get pregnant with #2 until #1 was walking proficiently . . . and that took a long, long time (much longer than 15 months). But it was worth it!

(Especially when my husband was traveling for work and I was having a threatened miscarriage and my doctor suggested I "rest in bed" and not "lift anything." Uhhhhh. . . .)