Baby Class Six: Last One!

Last night we got to learn the "Baby Care" part of the Birth and Baby Care class. It was much more upbeat and everyone was much more talkative. In other words, I got to make jokes for everyone, not just Anny.

Some things I learned last night:
Wipe front to back. Not being a girl myself, this is helpful and new info to know!
No alcohol on the umbilical stump. It will fall off on it's own.
No sunscreen for the first six months. That will make our secret trip tricky this summer.
Babies sleep for 14 hours a day and poop four times. I'm jealous on both accounts.
NO baby powder. I have always thought that baby powder is for babies. Apparently it can be inhaled and cause some sort of respiratory infections.

We did get to practice putting diapers onto the very rigid mannequins. We also practiced swaddling them. (wrapping the baby securely in a blanket)

So, with our certificate in hand we're ready to have this baby. That's all it takes, right?

I think we'll have a lot of learning on the job.......

Baby Class Five: Push, but DON'T Push

Last night we had our class that included "mock labor." There was an involved story about waking up to contractions (not waking Rob) and doing some breathing. now practice breathing.

Now contractions are a little stronger.... practice breathing with the four count.

Now you've gotten to the hospital because contractions are x minutes apart and last for x seconds.... practice breathing the next count. (I think it's two. Seems like natural progression.)

You get the picture! When we got to the "Now push, but don't push" part, Anny just had to hold her breath for an eight count, then let it go. I asked if the teacher ever had someone actually push during the practice stuff and induce their own labor. I was assured that it had not happened on her watch!

The entire mock labor lasted about 20 minutes. We were told nicely "okay, when it really happens it will be more like 14 hours, but that was easy, right?!"

The other big thing we did was go over all of the immediately-after-birth procedures and such.
Here's the ice pack that we use. Pass it around.
Here's the wonderful mesh panties you always hear about. Pass them around.
Here's what Tucks medicated pads look like. Pass them around.
Here's the massive maxi pad product that you will use. And you will appreciate it. Pass it around.

Sounds like fun.

Doctors appointment earlier this week said that measurements are right on track, so the earlier week-and-a-half-ahead is not the case anymore. Doesn't have to go back for two weeks to that office.

Another ultrasound today. Hopefully we'll get better pictures this time to share!

Baby Class: Bonus Classes!

This weekend we got TWO bonus baby (oriented) classes!

Saturday we toured the RIGHT hospital, but could not see any of the L&D or postpartum rooms because they were either in use or not cleaned from the prior use. We did get to see the nursery and hear about some of the procedures specific to our hospital. They told us that we should call mid-week and have a tour with one of the nurses to see the rooms. I don't think we'll be doing this.

Major downside that they reminded us of: it's a vegetarian hospital! I have had surgery there before and been subject to the "sloppy joe" that they serve, but every time that I leave, I forget. They will do meat meals for patients that require it, but you can't buy any meat from the cafeteria, which is where I will get my food from. Definately not planning on any "chicken tenders" or anything like that. I think I'll bring my own pizza or something....

Don't get me wrong, I respect the fact that we have chosen to use a faith-based hospital system and that part of their belief structure is being vegetarian. I'm just gonne have a sour face every time I remember that my "sausage" is not from a pig!

The other class was on Breastfeeding. Neither of us got much from it, as it was mostly taught and not conversational. I did see more nipples than I ever needed to, and have no desire to see boobs for a long while. (It will pass, I'm sure. I'm still a guy!)

The grossest part was that the teacher circulated a page with different types of poo on it. IN COLOR! I won't describe here, but if you have a strong stomach, you're welcome to visit HERE to see some examples. Yum. At least the pics on the linked site don't have baby-boys-bulging-boys.

That's all the baby classes I could handle for the weekend, so we're off until Thursday and our mock-labor!

Baby Class 4: "Just in Case"

Last night was our fourth (of six) birth and baby classes. This is the one that they over prepped me for, though it has calmed my brain down a bit.

I appreciate that they have a class specifically for things that "might come up" and we should prepare for, just in case. We started with the easy stuff, the baby vacuum and the forceps. We got into fetal monitors, both internal and external.

Then came the video. The Cesarean section video.

The video was not nearly as bad as I had prepared myself for. I think that's partly due to hearing more directly from our best-of-friends less than three weeks ago about their experience. Once again, there were things in the video that were being amended by the class leadership as it went along. MAKE NEW VIDEOS!! Call TLC, they have plenty!

These classes, though outdated most times, are good for putting video to what I've read over the last eight months. I am hoping that Anny is feeling the same way.

We did some relaxation exercises, too. We started with a visual trip to the beach. I immediately said "yeah, us red heads and the beach. relaxing." I'm guessing that Abby feels the same way too! As soon as we began to visualize the beach, she started trying to run in Anny's belly! It was funny for both of us.

Next week is practice labor. That should be interesting.... "PUSH, but not really!"

This afternoon we have an ultrasound scheduled. I doubt that I'll get the pics up today, but will hopefully get to it tomorrow. Tomorrow is our hospital tour at the right hospital, too.

Baby Class Number 3: Video and Tour

We both continue to think that the classes need to be updated in a serious way.

Last night we got to tour the maternity section of the hospital that we will not be delivering at. Kind of weird, but kind of cool at the same time! We got to see a baby that was about 20 minutes old. There were others in the nursery too. One re-new dad (his fourth) walked by and congratulated us all. Someone asked "which one is yours" and his response was the classic "I'm not sure.....they all look the same!"

We found out last night that about half of the couples in our class are not even delivering at this hospital. With so many around us, it's easy to take a class at one and deliver at another. (We have at least seven hospitals that are within a half hour drive from the house!)

We got to see a labor-room, complete with whirlpool. Someone asked how often women use the pool, and the nurse (teacher) said that it was rare. Some guy asked "if she (mom) is progressing nicely and there is some down time, can we as fathers' just take a quick dip?" What a jerk. Senseless and selfish.

Yes, it was me that asked the question. Only to get laughs, what a surprise!

Last night's other big feature was the birth video. Yum. There were two stories:

One woman went to a traditional hospital. She had an epidural. Her labor was good aside from that. She had her baby.

One woman went to a birthing center. She did not have an epidural. She got to demonstrate different positions of delivery because her baby just would not come out.

I was okay with watching both of these. I had mentally prepared myself for seeing all of it, I guess. What I could not deal with was the teachers description about the epidural. I don't know why I freaked out over hearing words more than over seeing video, but I did. Apparently I was still extra-pale (imagine Rob, but lighter!?! wow is that white!) from the dizziness.

I've had several surgeries in my life, and I think that is the difference. As she was describing getting the needle to the right spot, stopping, then starting the drug-flow I could vividly feel the biopsy needles that went into my back. I almost had to leave the room. I toughed it out.

That was an aside, I apologize. The videos are VERY old. The key giveaway: the guys glasses. The doctor and one of the husbands have the classic ~1976 black rimmed glasses. We were reminded several times that things in the videos have changed since they were made, like the epidural process. (they used to do doses, now have constant feed systems for better pain relief) If they are so out of date, MAKE NEW MOVIES!

We have a hospital tour of the hospital we will deliver at on May 5th. It will be fun to hear the differences between the two hospitals, since they are part of the same system!

Have a good weekend, and keep on voting about the Mother's Day gift. I sure could use a few more in the "no" column!!

The Three B's

Tonight we start our Birth, Baby and Breastfeeding Class at the hospital. Not really at OUR hospital, because they did not get enough people to take the class at our hospital. Luckily there are a few hospitals in the system over at Adventist Health Care, so we can take the class at one, and just do a tour at the other to orient ourselves.

"Bring a blanket and pillows tomorrow night. We will be doing some 'floor work'" was the message that we got yesterday!

Another tick off of the put-off-my-projects clock. There are some things that remind me that I have a TON to get done:

• Feeling how strong her kicks are. Absolutely amazing.
• Looking at a calendar at work that has bright green highlighter on our due date.
• Dinner with our best-of-friends who are due literally ANY day now.
• Spring Break has passed for Anny, so the countdown to end-of-school has begun.
• Starting the six week class that ends less than four before our due date.

So - there is still a lot to get done, and a little time to do it all. I have come to understand that "Due Date" means nothing. I need to not schedule things up until that date, but am also aware that it could go longer.

I secretly wish for a shorter timeframe for Anny's sake. I also secretly wish for a longer timeframe for the sake of getting things around the house done.

As tonight will probably be awkward, I'm sure that I'll have a good story or two tomorrow!